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What would you do in the name of love?

April 8, 2016

Did you catch the title of this article? What should stand out most is "NYC Man Forces Wife to Walk Naked", emphasis on Forces. We all know that no one can force you to do anything, even in the gravest of circumstances, we still have a choice.

 

Now, regardless to how I felt about the verbiage, the story itself was interesting, got me to thinking about all the crazy things people would do in the name of love.  

 

Clearly this woman loved this man, so much so that she chose to walk outside naked with hopes of gaining forgiveness. But let's think about this for a second, there are other things that we need to consider besides her willingness to walk naked in hopes of forgiveness. Like, what made the woman desire to "sext" other men?  And why would defiling your wife in public make it easier to forgive her? So first let us consider what would make this married woman desire to "sext" other men.

 

What made the woman desire to "sext" other men?

 

Clearly the marriage suffered in some way. Now in what way specifically, I am uncertain, but what I do believe is that getting caught was more of a shock than walking in the street naked. If that wasn't the case than the woman may not have be able to fathom walking down the street nude.

 

For me personally it doesn't matter what I have done to hurt someone, I apologize for my actions and I make every effort to improve that behavior. And that does not mean I go through with some extreme act to prove my love. Because if you ever get to the point of needing to perform extreme acts in order to reaffirm someone's love for you, than you need to question your love for that individual.

 

Too often, pride and expectation blind the reality of love. We often forget that we are human and we are imperfect, and therefore we do not always love perfectly. We tend to set expectations of love that are just unrealistic, but in our minds we deem it (those expectations) what we need to see for us to be able to identify love. For example, this husband felt that he needed his wife to walk naked, in order to redeem herself. But what was the purpose?  What was his motive? The only thing the husband truly stood to gain was to make himself "feel better". But did this really make him really feel better? That is certainly something he would need to discuss, but if I had to guess, I would say absolutely not.  

 

Even if he experienced a moment of gratification, he still did not gain back the ability to trust his wife. And if he really took a second to think about his actions, he would have to admit that if nothing else he increased the number of men who have seen parts of his wife that should be foreign to them and adorned only by him. Now granted I understand the husband's frustration and disappointment with his wife, and I am sure her actions left him broken hearted, but, since when has it become ok to "punish" people for doing things? We can't be the judge and the jury. Either you love or you do not love. And if you love, no matter how someone has hurt you, if you truly love, you do not seek revenge. Revenge has no place in love. Period. 

 

Why would defiling your wife in public make it easier to forgive her? 

 

If your wife, desired to "sext" with other men, not only is her loyalty in question but so is her love. So how could "punishing" her make you feel better or make her feel worse?

 

Consider the the possibility of her doing it again. When people do things,there is, 100% of the time, a motive behind their actions, whether selfish or unselfish, there is always a motive. And while she may hold her husband's feelings in high regard, she may be more concerned with being caught than actually changing her behavior. So if her concern was more so being caught, she was more prideful about her husband knowing what she had done, than she was regretful about doing it. If that is the case there is a great chance that she could do it again.


A perfect example of this is when a man cheats on a woman. Most men when they cheat the first thing they do is try to get the woman to forgive them through grand gestures (spending money on gifts, etc.). Typically when this is the case, the man is not necessarily mad because he cheated, he is mad because the woman is hurt and wants nothing more to do with him. So he makes an effort to rebuild that trust, and makes other efforts in order to not be caught again.

 

Do you see what I am saying?

 

He has no intention of changing his behavior, but he is mad that he got caught. And there's nothing the woman can make him do to change his behavior. That has to be something he wants to do for himself.

 

In this case there's nothing this husband could do, or could have made his wife do, that will make her change her behavior. She has to want to do so herself. And just because she walked outside naked, doesn't mean she will change her behavior, only that she recognizes the hurt and wants to try heal her husbands emotional wounds.

 

Now how and when people deal with the consequences for their actions, is not up for us to decide. We have realize that there is nothing we could do to get even... 

 

What have you done in the name of love? Why?


I guarantee, whatever you may have done did not make you or your significant other feel better. Especially if you only did it because you got caught...

 

 

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