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I know I deserve you, but why don't I want you?

December 21, 2016

 

Add me to the list with all the other 999,999,999 women who want a good man and know they deserve one, but for some reason just doesn't want one or how to recognize one...

 

What is up with us, right?

I mean if I had the answer to why women don't always want the man they deserve, I would probably be on Oprah, or I'd be the next Iyanla, because that's a million dollar answer!

 

While I believe that the reasons why we choose to walk away from men we deserve vary from woman to woman, I have come up with 3 reasons why we may not want to love, know how to love and/or recognize the man that we deserve.

3 Reasons Why Women Can't or Won't Love the Man They Deserve

 

 

1. She doesn't know herself.

 

This one is quite easy to understand in that when you don't know yourself, you don't know how you love, how you need to be loved and what you want and deserve from love. 

 

It's important that as women we spend time getting to know ourselves, so that we can easily recognize what we need and want from love.

 

2.She doesn't know her worth.

 

Women shy away from good men mainly because they don't recognize their worth. When you know what you deserve, you don't settle for anything less. 

 

Number two goes hand and hand with number one because you have to know yourself to understand what you're worth. Many don't realize that knowing your worth is simply understanding what you need to be the best you. And anyone that gives you less than what you need, is nothing that you're worth.

 

It's important to understand the woman you are, how you love and what you need from love in order to easily identify a man that is worthy of your love.

 

3. She wants to hold out for something greater.

 

We all want that fairy tale love. Unfortunately love doesn't happen like that for all of us. Some of us actually have to experience love trials in order to learn how to love and grow in love. 

 

When you actually know yourself and understand your worth, it's easy to walk away from a man we deserve, because any little thing a man does, we will be quick to believe that we deserve better. 

 

And while it's important that we do not settle in love, it's also important that we learn the difference between recognizing the best (what we deserve), and just wanting more than we can handle.

 

The easiest way to recognize that you're holding out when you should be buying in, is to consider or list reasons why that individual is not capable of loving you as you need to be loved. When you read your responses, read them aloud so that you can make sense of what you're actually keeping yourself from.

 

Sometimes we need to see and hear ridiculous, in order to recognize ridiculous.

 


I wish I didn't struggle with holding out for a more deserving man, but I do. And I do believe that it's because I refuse to allow myself to be loved, in fear that it won't be what I deserve.

 

So in most cases, I don't really know whether the man I am walking away from is truly capable of loving me the way I need, because I don't give him the chance to love me. 


I don't have the answer for why I do it. But I believe that when it's time for me to be open and less fearful, I will know because I will trust and follow my intuition...

 

What do you think?


Share your stories below.

 

 

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